The comics aren’t the only place to find “funnies” in the newspaper!
From the classified ads:
Free: Piano with matching bench seat, very good condition, all keys work probably (Source: Gettysburg Area Merchandiser)
Free: 5 kitchen drawers, all matching naughty pine fronts (Topeka Capital-Journal)
Free rent in exchange for elderly woman (Source: 11points.com)
HONDA CIVIC ’96, AM/FM/CD, low miles, Good condition. Speaks Spanish. $3500.
“Waitress wanted. Must be 18 years old with 20 years’ experience.” (top5.com)
Auto Repair Service: Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.
Real newspaper typos:
“Here the bridal couple stood, facing the floral setting and exchanged cows.” (Modesto News-Herald – California)
“It took many rabbits many years to write the Talmud.” (Holland MI Evening Sentinel)
“Mrs. ____ fell downstairs at her home this morning, breaking her myhodudududududududosy, and suffered painful injuries.” (Ohio paper)
And from the headlines:
First Microbes Breathed Sulfur Before It Was Cool (Washington Post)
West Point Cadets Train for Life in Iraq with Weekend in N.J.
(Times Herald-Record Newburgh, New York)
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge (Boseman Daily Chronicle)
City Unsure Why the Sewer Smells (The Herald-Palladium, St. Joseph, Michigan)
British Left Waffles on Falklands (The Guardian)
Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years at Checkout Counter
“Missippi’s Literacy Program Shows Improvement”
