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A Memory

Posted on January 22, 2020January 21, 2020 by Pam R

One of my earliest memories is in my grandparents’ apartment. I was maybe 3 years old, swinging my feet into the air between furniture and enjoying myself thoroughly.

“Be careful,” cautioned my grandfather. “You might break something.”

Do 3-year-olds ever listen? But then my hand slipped – and something broke. I ran to burrow into my grandmother’s closet and hide.

Of course they knew where I was. My question when Granny opened the door was, “Is Paw Paw mad at me?” (Right then, that was all that mattered.)

“No,” she replied. “Paw Paw isn’t mad at you.” In retrospect, I think I hear amusement in her voice.

I don’t remember anything more about that incident, but I recognize it now as Grace.

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Grace is the opposite of justice (receiving what you deserve). It is more than Mercy (being spared what you deserve). Grace is getting what you totally don’t deserve: God’s love and favor. A gift.

The Psalmist puts it this way:
But Lord, your nurturing love is tender and gentle.
You are slow to get angry yet so swift to show your faithful love.
You are full of abounding grace and truth. Psalm 86: 15 The Passion Translation (PTP)

A lot is written about Grace. J. I. Packer says, “The Grace of God is love freely shown toward guilty sinners, contrary to their merit and indeed in defiance of their demerit.” That child was guilty: she hadn’t listened.

“Grace means undeserved kindness,” writes Dwight L. Moody. “It is the gift of God to man the moment he sees he is unworthy of God’s favor.” That child felt unworthy. Why else hide? (Remember Eden? Hiding was and is the human response to disobedience.)

One of my favorite writers, Anne Lamott, says, “I do not at all understand the mystery of Grace – only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us.”

Grace found that small child cowering in a closet, but Grace didn’t leave her there. And Grace has been with her ever since.

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“Amazing Grace! how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost but now am found, was blind but now I see.

T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear, and Grace my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear the hour I first believed.”
– John Newton

Amen and amen.

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